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"I went to Montreal. My first gig went very badly. They just weren't laughing at anything. I found out they were a load of Christians, and it was a gig to raise money for a new church roof."
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"To make dollars from cents you have to have sense."
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Personal Development

"A drunkard would not give money to sober people. He said they would only eat it, and buy clothes and send their children to school with it."
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Personal Development

"Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth."
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Personal Development

"Nothing induces me to read a novel except when I have to make money by writing about it. I detest them."
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Personal Development

"To understand someone, find out how he spends his money."
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Personal Development

"Egoism and Money [Goddess of wealth; Lakshmi] are very much at odds [have great enmity]. There should be just enough egoism to accomplish one's work. Beyond that, any expanded egoism and money have great enmity. Money (Lakshmi) stays away from it."
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Personal Development

"Money cannot buy you love. But it sure can buy you things that some people will love you for having."
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Personal Development

"When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money."
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"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."
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"All about the fucking money... money... money... thinking it's for the good for your generation... but so far it's neither and for that and neither and for that... It's mostly for the worst of your generation and other's generations."
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Explore more quotes by Allan Carr

"I'm just generally hugely frustrated, I'm a very, very frustrated man. I'm just a ball of pent-up frustration."
Frustration

"I was at college doing performing arts, and just spending all my time mucking about, and the lecturers thought I would be pretty good at stand-up, so I gave it a whirl."
Time

"I went to Montreal. My first gig went very badly. They just weren't laughing at anything. I found out they were a load of Christians, and it was a gig to raise money for a new church roof."
Money

"I was quite pleased that Prince Philip didn't say anything like, I hate queers! He was quite well behaved."
Hate

"We had our first meeting yesterday, and we just laughed all the way through, so if we can bottle that, then I'll be happy. We just get on, and that's half the battle."
Battle

"A lot of comedians, when they have a bad gig, will blame everything but themselves. They'll blame the crowd, or the room was wrong, it had a weird vibe, or the promoter promoted a weird atmosphere."
Blame

"I didn't really want to be a comedian."
Want

"If you go on stage with the wrong attitude, or something in your performance is off, you can lose an audience in the first minute. That first minute is crucial."
Attitude

"I'd love to do acting, but it'd definitely have to be comedy. I can't do serious. It's completely beyond me."
Love

"You should never meet your heroes. Paul Newman... I was so excited about meeting him, but he turned up in shell suit bottoms, slippers, and a jumper. He was just so worn out and old, he wanted to go home."
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