"If it looks like a cat, walks like a cat, and has whiskers like a cat, it's probably a damn cat. But if it eats your groceries, messes up your kitchen, and makes you want to rip out your hair by the roots, you either married it or gave birth to it."

Family, Humor, Reality, Irony

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"If it looks like a cat, walks like a cat, and has whiskers like a cat, it's probably a damn cat. But if it eats your groceries, messes up your kitchen, and makes you want to rip out your hair by the roots, you either married it or gave birth to it."

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Explore more quotes by Lois Greiman

"Maybe in fairytales you're only as old as you feel, but here in L. A. you're every second as old as your pores."

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"There isn't much a pan of warm Brownies and a glass of milk will fix. In less it's low grain prices. Or poverty. Or the national debt. I guess there are a few things, but nothing you have to worry about right this minute."

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"And thanks to Christina McMullen, who has taught me that common sense and intelligence need not have any correlation whatsoever."

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"Yeah, world peace would be all right, but what about a day off in a slab of ham the size of my head."

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"He looked from His heavens and saw it was good, the toes and the crows all looked like they should. The bunny was quick, the finch bright as a daisy, the owl flew at night, and the tortoise was lazy."

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