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"An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived."
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"I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof of Biography."

"I might go on discussing this subject at great length, but after all is said, done, and written, my own book of experiences will best show what these obstacles are, and how I managed to overcome them to some extent."

"If you say a modern celebrity is an adulterer, a pervert and a drug addict, all it means is that you've read his autobiography."

"In a word I was a pioneer, and therefore had to blaze my own trail."

"Autobiography is probably the most respectable form of lying."

"I've been working on my autobiography, just pecking away in longhand. The more you write, the more you remember. The more you remember, the more detail you recall. It's not all pleasant!"

"Autobiography begins with a sense of being alone. It is an orphan form."

"I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead."

"There may be a point where I may decide to write an autobiography."
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