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"What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong."
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"It's so hard to know what to do when one wishes earnestly to do right."
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Personal Development
"Even though you are on the right track - you will get run over if you just sit there."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I checked myself out in that funeral parlour scene. I saw myself laughing, because there was a shot of Ed and I together and Mary was right in back of us. My head turned from the camera and I saw myself laughing, because Mary was absolutely brilliant in that thing."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The shock of unemployment becomes a pathology in its own right."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is important to keep your head up and follow what you believe is right."
Author Name
Personal Development
"When I record somebody else's song, I have to make it my own or it doesn't feel right. I'll say to myself, I wrote this and he doesn't know it!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"I think every woman should have a one-night stand. If it's done right, it can be liberating."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you had a face like mine, you'd punch me right on the nose, and I'm just the fella to do it."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You can't second-guess your audience. You can only do what you think is right. If you do that, your audience will appreciate you."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Stand, you've been sitting much too long, there's a permanent crease in your right or wrong."
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Personal Development
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"You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks."
Drink
"Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs."
People
"When in doubt, go for the dick joke."
Doubt
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Men
"Spring is nature's way of saying, "Let's party!""
Nature
"Comedy is acting out optimism."
Optimism
"What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong."
Right
"The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery."
Right
"Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose."
Fight
"The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and yelling, 'You want a piece of me?'"
Baseball
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