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"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."
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Exlpore more Humor quotes
"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."
"They lack suggestive power. And when a book lacks suggestive power, however hard it hits the surface of the mind it cannot penetrate within."
"To me she said, "It's this stupid gotcha thing, they've been doing it for weeks now. Leaping out at each other and us, scaring the hell out of everyone.""It's a game of wits," Bert said to me."Half-wits," Kristy added."
"Epic sex?" I sputtered. "By what standards, precisely, is sex judged to be epic?""And tons and tons of mortal simps like you used as pawns." Bob sighed happily, ignoring my question. "There are no words. It was like the Lord of the Rings and All My Children made a baby with the Macho Man Randy Savage and a Whac-A-Mole machine."
"I've accepted the fact I have mental illness but when my imaginary friends start calling me crazy that's where I draw the line."
Explore more quotes by Abraham Lincoln
"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or exercise their revolutionary right to overthrow it."
"Our defense is in the preservation of the spirit which prizes liberty as a heritage of all men, in all lands, everywhere. Destroy this spirit and you have planted the seeds of despotism around your own doors."
"Allow the president to invade a neighboring nation, whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion, and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary for such a purpose - and you allow him to make war at pleasure."
"Don't interfere with anything in the Constitution. That must be maintained, for it is the only safeguard of our liberties."
"I want it said of me by those who knew me best, that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow."
"These men ask for just the same thing, fairness, and fairness only. This, so far as in my power, they, and all others, shall have."
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