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"You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old."
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"Last I checked, the album was #82 out of the top 200 on the Billboard charts thanks to you all. I pray that keeps moving up and with your help it will."
"Wherever I go for the military, they always call me Lt. Dan. They just can't help it."
"I was sent down to Cuba. Everything had been prepared with the help of Congressman Johnson and his staff."
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"This will help us next year with the World Cup. I can imagine a lot of visitors from abroad will be here and asking what happened between 1933 and 1945. A lot of that will come up. I think this will make an important contribution to those discussions."
"So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it."
Explore more quotes by George Burns
"Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle."
"First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down."
"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible."
"It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty."
"You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there."
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