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"Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand."
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"There were a few 6th form girls that I got with when I was I the 6th form, they were really nice, so that was cool."
"There are eight girls in the house in which I am living, and practically all of them are good looking. You can realize that I am kept busy."
"Girls can wear jeans, cut their hair short, wear shirts and boots, 'cause it's okay to be a boy, but for a boy to look like a girl is degrading."
"I'm not against half naked girls - not as often as I'd like to be."
"I would never describe Charlotte as a prude - maybe at the start, but that was in comparison to the other girls. She wasn't willing to do the stuff they were doing - and I mean, thank goodness!"
Explore more quotes by Benny Hill
"The odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and take a bomb."
"I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: "Oh well," and I went back to smoking again, and that was better."
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