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"A friend of mine said, no matter what I do I always look like an English teacher. She actually said, you still look like a Campbell's Soup kid."
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"True friendship is a house where we can take off our masks."
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Personal Development
"To lose a worthless friend is worthy of a testimony."
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Personal Development
"A true friend is a reflection of yourself."
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Personal Development
"Good fences make good neighbors, and these were apparently good enough that they had not felt the need for razor wire at the top. I crested the fence, threw myself into the yard beyond, fell, rolled to my feet, and ran with the expectation of being garroted by a taut clothesline.I heard panting, looked down, and saw a gold retriever running at my side, ears flapping. The dog glanced up at me tongue rolling, grinning, as though jazzed by the prospect of an unscheduled play session."
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Personal Development
"I to myself am dearer than a friend."
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Personal Development
"One friend in a storm is worth more than a thousand friends in sunshine."
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Personal Development
"A friend is someone who will always be there for you, in good and hard times."
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Personal Development
"Don't appreciate me, I'm not up to it. Don't criticize me, I don't deserve it. Just be my friend and forgive me, because I am craving for it."
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Personal Development
"If you fulfill God's will, then God will always be your friend."
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Personal Development
"Friendship, neglected, is like a flower deprived of water and sunlight."
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"I want to host a religious show. I'm sure nobody will be wanting the 11 o'clock spot on Sunday morning. I think we should really get some of our own preachers and preach that gay is good. And we'd have a great choir."
Gay
"I'm really happy that I was raised Catholic because it's given me years of material."
Years
"As you can imagine I'm disappointed as anything that I was not selected to be the presidential running mate. And I find it continually appalling that it would be a radical thing to have a woman on the ticket."
Radical
"They didn't even like Margaret Thatcher but at least there was Margaret Thatcher. There have been women, you know, Sonia Gandhi for heaven's sakes in India."
Woman
"I consider a CD or a comedy collection as a record of what I've been doing, and I try to wrap it up and start new material."
Comedy
"My style has been pretty much like a newspaper. It's got politics in it, it's got media, sports, family relations, you know, all the sections you would expect, and wonderful religion things."
Family
"Lesbians are likely to be drawn to stand-up, if only because it's cheaper to produce and therefore more accessible for women. But the very form of stand-up is masculine."
Woman
"We really got a lot of very conservative gay people. You could look at the figures from the last election and realize that a third of the gay movement voted Republican."
People
"Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out as a lesbian onstage is still a very political act; if it weren't, more women would do it."
Humor
"We signed up for Showtime, which I think put us on a Homeland Security list somewhere."
Security
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