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"I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable."
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"The condition you're in at this moment is the product of your previous thoughts, to change your condition, change your thoughts."
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Explore more quotes by Woody Allen
"The artist's job is not to succumb to despair but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence."
"I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic."
"Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies."
"There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more."
"Those modern analysts they charge so much! In my day for five marks Freud himself would treat you. For ten marks he would treat you and press your pants. For fifteen marks Freud would let you treat him - that included a choice of any two vegetables."
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