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Andy Rooney

"I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting."

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"I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting."

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A.E. Samaan

"If music be the food of love, play on."

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A.E. Samaan

"I believe in using words, not fists. I believe in my outrage knowing people are living in boxes on the street. I believe in honesty. I believe in a good time. I believe in good food. I believe in sex."

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A.E. Samaan

"We may find in the long run that tinned food is a deadlier weapon than the machine-gun."

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A.E. Samaan

"We have had for breakfast, toasts, cakes, a yorkshire pie, a piece of beef about the size and much the shape of my portmanteau, tea, coffee, ham and eggs..."

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A.E. Samaan

"There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick."

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A.E. Samaan

"The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small."

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A.E. Samaan

"I'm not sure why it is, but I love food more than just about anything else."

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A.E. Samaan

"Temptation is like a knife, that may either cut the meat or the throat of a man; it may be his food or his poison, his exercise or his destruction."

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A.E. Samaan

"They're now turning those seeds into intellectual property, so they have a virtual lock on the seeds upon which we all depend for our food and survival."

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A.E. Samaan

"On this National Agriculture Day, when we all should be taking time to thank and pay tribute to America's farmers, ranchers and their families who produce the food for our tables, we are finding those same people in dire need of our help and support."

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Andy Rooney
"The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account."
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"I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran."
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Andy Rooney
"The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians."
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Andy Rooney
"Death is a distant rumor to the young."
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Andy Rooney
"Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated. A lot of smart people do it to pretend they aren't very smart - want to be just one of the boys."
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Andy Rooney
"People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."
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Andy Rooney
"I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you."
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Andy Rooney
"The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread."
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Andy Rooney
"If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one."
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Andy Rooney
"I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you."
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