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"Thousands of years and many civilizations have defined a marriage as the union between one man and one woman. With few exceptions, those civilizations that did not follow that perished."
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"Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards."
"Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel."
"Marriage is the only Institution With One Access: Entrance Only, No Exit, No Outing Option So Look Well Before You Dive Into It."
"Marriage converts a player into a polygamist."
"In order not to make a liar out of Henry or Katherine, one or the other, the committee men think up circumstances in which the match may have been partly consummated, or somewhat consummated, and to do this they have to imagine every disaster and shame that can occur between a man and a woman alone in a room in the dark."
"Any marriage happy or unhappy is infinitely more interesting and significant than any romance however passionate."
"All marriages have their bad sides, because people have weaknesses. If you live with another human being you learn to handle these weaknesses in a variety of ways. For instance, you might take the view that weaknesses are a bit like heavy pieces of furniture, and based on this you must learn to clean around them. To maintain the illusion."
"Compromise, communicate, and never go to bed angry - the three pieces of advice gifted and regifted to all newlyweds."
Explore more quotes by Randy Neugebauer
"Small businesses are the number one job creators in America. Therefore, it is important that the federal government creates an environment that helps them succeed, not one that sets them up to fail."
"Border security is a complex issue and will remain a top priority during the 2007 legislative year. As Congress works to fix this problem, I will continue to push for strong measures that beef up security at our borders."
"In addition to a soaring stock market, 6.6 million jobs have been created since tax relief measures went into effect in 2003. Our deficit situation has also improved as tax revenues have increased at double-digit rates over the past two years."
"President Bush has a track record of making the right decisions when it comes to national security."
"Forty-five States, as the gentleman just said, have determined by people that were elected by the people of that State that marriage is the definition of one man and one woman."
"At a time when we are dealing with unpredictable suppliers of energy abroad and higher gas costs at home, the decision to increase domestic energy exploration is integral to a balanced, common sense energy policy."
"The weekend brought good news for our friends in the cattle industry. At long last, Japan has taken the steps needed for American beef to make its way back into the Japanese market."
"For too long, Japan has been dragging its feet as it ignores the steps the U.S. has made to ensure a safe beef supply and shows a disregard for our prior trade pacts."
"When regulations on the housing industry are reasonable, the cost of housing goes down. Regulatory relief is needed to make housing more affordable to more Americans."
"When rough times have fallen upon our state in the past, Texans have always responded with generosity and an eagerness to help. The compassionate response to the fires has proven that this community spirit is alive and well."
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