"You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led."

Woman, Women, Gentlemen, Will

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"You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led."

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Explore more quotes by Johnny Vegas

"With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle."

Audience

"I also want to return to doing stand-up. I've become frightened of live audiences. This is a really telling sign that I need to go back on the comedy circuit again."

Audience

"I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind."

Birthday

"I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough."

Birthday

"I've got too much respect for stand-ups to call myself one."

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"There's this idea that it has to be made in London. But we've got everything up here, and if you've got comics who are gifted because of where they're from, you shouldn't drag them away from that natural resource."

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"It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether."

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"For the greater good, I thought I should be a spiritual leader for people for some reason."

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"I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts come up."

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"You can't be a proper comic unless you've been out on stage and felt the fear."

Fear