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"Women and elephants never forget."
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"Good God. Men everywhere."

"She was a most wonderful woman for prowling about the house. How she got from story to story was a mystery beyond solution. A lady so decorous in herself, and so highly connected, was not to be suspected of dropping over the banisters or sliding down them, yet her extraordinary facility of locomotion suggested the wild idea. Another noticeable circumstance in Mrs. Sparsit was, that she was never hurried. She would shoot with consummate velocity from the roof to the hall, yet would be in full possession of her breath and dignity on the moment of her arrival there. Neither was she ever seen by human vision to go at a great pace."

"Right now, it's hard to imagine that it is raining anywhere in the world."

"The surveillance, he thought, essentially should be maintained. And, if possible, by me. I should always be watching, watching and figuring out, even if I never do anything about what I see; even if I just sit there and observe silently, not seen: that is important, that I as a watcher of all that happens should be at my place."

"Men, she thought, were odd about their clothes: they liked to wear the same things until they became defeated and threadbare."

"I'm almost afraid to tell you. Let's put it this way: clean toilets are the least of your problems in this country."

"You can't go by what a girl says, when she's giving you the devil for making a chump of yourself. It's like Shakespeare. Sounds well, but doesn't mean anything."

"One must always proceed with method. I made an error of judgment asking you that question. Toeach man his own knowledge. You could tell me the details of the patient's physical appearance- nothing there would escape you. If I wanted information about the papers on the desk, Mr. Raymond would have noticed anything there was to see. To find out about the fire, I must ask the man whose business is to observe such things. - Detective Hercule Poirot to Doctor Sheppard."

"He is not a man wedded to action, Boleyn, but rather a man who stands by, smirking and stroking his beard; he thinks he looks enigmatic, but instead he looks as if he's pleasuring himself."
Explore more quotes by Dorothy Parker


"You think You're frightening me with Your hell, don't You? You think Your hell is worse than mine."


"Eternity is a ham and two people (also given as 'Eternity is two people and a ham') is an old quip from the days when a ham was huge-far more than two people could finish. Irma Rombauer mentions this line in her famous cookbook, The Joy of Cooking."


"I never see that prettiest thing-A cherry bough gone white with Spring-But what I think, 'How gay 'twould beTo hang me from a flowering tree."


"Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away."


"She realizes she doesn't know as much as God but feels she knows as much as God knew when he was her age."


"That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment."


"It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day."


"Yet, as only New Yorkers know, if you can get through the twilight, you'll live through the night."
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