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"Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers."
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"The Edge... there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over."
"But contrary to what some people seem to think, I was never a bully. I was just a hard man."
"Part of the early Who career was all about knocking people's confidences out."
"To people outside, they think, Gee, that's great. You get to go here and there. The other side of that is our expression, This is location, not vacation."
"I disagree with people who think you learn more from getting beat up than you do from winning."
"Saddam has committed many crimes against humanity and against his own people."
"The mutual fund industry and small investors are very relentless and very unforgiving if people don't perform."
Explore more quotes by Jay Leno
"I think high self-esteem is overrated. A little low self-esteem is actually quite good. Maybe you're not the best, so you should work a little harder."
"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet."
"The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets."
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it."
"According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it."
"Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced they're getting back together. You know what that means? There's still hope for Ike and Tina Turner."
"Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate."
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