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"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people."
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"I read some, and then visited with people involved in this curious, exciting and somewhat misunderstood sub-culture. I met with a fang maker, who offered to fit me for an exquisite pair."

"A lot of compelling stories in the world aren't being told, and the fact that people don't know about them compounds the suffering."

"There is always something infinitely mean about other people's tragedies."

"I am attracted to people who make this effort in knowing what suits them - they are individual and stylish."

"People used to complain that selling a president was like selling a bar of soap. But when you buy soap, at least you get the soap. In this campaign you just get two guys telling you they really value cleanliness."

"I'm not a slave to objectivity. I'm never quite sure what it means. And it means different things to different people."

"Now how many people in their heart of hearts in that community want to see the demise of this country? How many would cheer, not out loud maybe, but in their heart when things like 9/11 occur and I'll tell you; it's a majority among them."
Explore more quotes by Yakov Smirnoff

"Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling."

"We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales."

"We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel."

"In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One."

"Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list."

"I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good."
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