"Wasn't allowed to have pets. I killed my pet cockroach when it crawled into my ear."

Humor, Childhood, Memory, Isolation

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"Wasn't allowed to have pets. I killed my pet cockroach when it crawled into my ear."

Exlpore more Humor quotes

"Don't interrupt me while I'm interrupting."

Winston Churchill, English Statesman

Humor, Communication, Life, Patience

"If it weren't for the last minute nothing would get done."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Procrastination, Delay, Action

"And if I talk to him, I'll say something wrong, give something away. I can feel it coming, a betrayal of myself."

Margaret Atwood, Canadian Novelist

Humor, Escape, Solitude, Space, Privacy

"Kemp: I demonstrated conclusively this morning that invisibility--I.M: Never mind what YOU'VE DEMONSTRATED!--I'm starving, said the voice, and the night is--chilly for a man without clothes."

H. G. Wells, English Author

Humor, Observation, Survival, Humanity

"I hope you're not smoking in front of her,' Lucia says to him.'Yeah, I lie in bed and puff in her face, Lucia,' he says, irritated."

Melina Marchetta, Australian Author

Humor, Observation, Life, Interaction

"Niagara ... is the first disappointment in the married life of many Americans who spend their honeymoon there."

Oscar Wilde, Irish Dramatist

Humor, Disappointment, Marriage, Travel, America

"God alert!" Blackjack yelled. "It's the wine dude!Mr. D sighed in exasperation. "The next person, or horse, who calls me the 'wine dude' will end up in a bottle of Merlot!"

Rick Riordan, American Novelist

Humor, Truth, Wisdom, Power

"I always try to cheer myself up by singing when i get sad. Most of the time, it turns out that my voice is worse than my problems."

Anonymous, Unknown Unknown

Humor, Singing, Sadness, Voice

"When you love someone, you don't care that she ate your sandwich. You only hope she found it delicious."

Richelle E. Goodrich, American Poet

Humor, Love, Happiness, Today, Truth

"Looking for a wife is like fishing; before you go, make sure you don't have a hole in your net."

Matshona Dhliwayo, Zimbabwean Philosopher

Humor, Marriage, Fishing, Perspective

Explore more quotes by Katherine McIntyre

"No monster would hold the hurt I see in your eyes or carry the guilt you do every day."

Compassion

"My hands trembled, so I took a deep drag to calm my frayed nerves. I just wanted to forget that terrible sight, but questions multiplied in my mind as the smoke furled."

Anxiety

"Took long enough, she called out, not wanting to admit how the sight of him made her throat hitch, how the man was so gorgeous she lost her mind. 'I thought you drowned in the mirror from staring into your reflection too long."

Attraction

"She felt him smile against her neck and bit down, the sensation sending shivers through her. 'Bad girl. If you keep doing that, I'll have you stripped and on your back before you can blink."

Desire

"Ice upon ice, and yet, inside, she melted and mourned all the same."

Life

"Once upon a time, he might've chased her and tumbled her in the sheets with the promise of more in the future."

Affection

"Go figure, that happened to be his same style of flirtation as well - annoy her half to death until, before she could stop herself, she confessed her deep darks and bonded with him to a degree she never had before."

Acceptance

"He looked so frustrated and perfectly serious, and yet here we were talking about his missing seal pelt."

Humor

"Like a firework, a person's life flashed brightest right before expiration."

Soul

"The tides rolled up to crash against the shore while we sat feet from one another with the remnants of all we'd left unsaid driving us apart."

Pain