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Joan Rivers

"My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash."

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"My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash."

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Donna Grant

"Don't dumb it down. The audience is smart and gets what you are doing."

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Donna Grant

"My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash."

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Donna Grant

"When Andy died, I just drank to dumb my mind."

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Donna Grant

"I'm really, really dumb about describing wine, but I like wine that's full-bodied and dry."

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Donna Grant

"Innocence is like a dumb leper who has lost his bell, wandering the world, meaning no harm."

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"I'm stupid, I'm ugly, I'm dumb, I smell. Did I mention I'm stupid?"

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Donna Grant

"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde."

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Donna Grant

"I had to go to a mirror and look at it. I couldn't picture myself in my own head. I had no image beyond a stick figure. I wasn't a mean person as a kid, or dumb, and something has to be said to justify excluding you."

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Donna Grant

"Maybe these kids are just too young and too dumb to know about the first 13. Maybe they can't comprehend that the Braves have only won one World Series in those 13 years."

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Donna Grant

"I remember working with Rod, though, on Chrysler Hour. I was too young and dumb to know that I was supposed to be scared of anybody or anything - like getting fired or anything like that."

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"I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor."
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"Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be."
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"Our natures are a lot like oil, mix us with anything else, and we strive to swim on top."
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"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."
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"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present."
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"Boy George is all England needs - another queen who can't dress."
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"I have no methods; all I do is accept people as they are."
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"The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."
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"Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer."
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