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Fran Lebowitz

"Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass."

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"Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to irritate the situation by making an effort. If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass."

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Aberjhani

"Often people display a curious respect for a man drunk, rather like the respect of simple races for the insane... There is something awe-inspiring in one who has lost all inhibitions."

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Aberjhani

"The last resort of kings, the cannonball. The last resort of the people, the paving stone."

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Aberjhani

"It is not true that people are naturally equal for no two people can be together for even a half an hour without one acquiring an evident superiority over the other."

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Aberjhani

"There are bad people who would be less dangerous if they were quite devoid of goodness."

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Aberjhani

"Whatever good things people say of us, they tell us nothing new."

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Aberjhani

"I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal."

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Aberjhani

"There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating - people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing."

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Aberjhani

"Stephen King in many respects is a wonderful writer. He has made a contribution. People in the future will be able to pick up Stephen King's books and learn a lot about who we were by reading those books."

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Aberjhani

"We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones."

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Aberjhani

"Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them."

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Fran Lebowitz
"I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add."
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Fran Lebowitz
"When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Food is an important part of a balanced diet."
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Fran Lebowitz
"If you're going to America, bring your own food."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications."
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Fran Lebowitz
"Andy Warhol made fame more famous."
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Fran Lebowitz
"There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior."
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