"The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public."

Woman, Women, Football, Play, Public

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"The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public."

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"A women knows how to keep quiet when she is in the right, whereas a man, when he is in the right, will keep on talking."

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"If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like."

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"What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day."

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"A smile is a curve that sets everything straight."

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"We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up."

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"There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto."

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"My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee."

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"Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight."

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