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Exlpore more Humor quotes

"I should curl up in a ball and cry. Instead i think about everything in the whole entire world that makes me angry - There is a lot, oh, there is a lot - and I start singing Justin Bieber at the top of my lungs."

"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

"Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you."

"Don't ask for a girl's hand in marriage and forget to ask for her leg too."

"If love was a crime, God would encourage us all to go to prison."
Explore more quotes by Gillian Flynn

"Love makes you want to be a better man-right, right. But maybe love, real love, also gives you permission to just be the man you are."

"I feel like Amy wanted people to believe she really was perfect. And as we got to be friends, I got to know her. And she wasn't perfect. You know? She was brilliant and charming and all that, but she was also controlling and OCD and a drama queen and a bit of a liar. Which was fine by me. It just wasn't fine by her. She got rid of me because I knew she wasn't perfect."

"Sometimes I think I won't ever feel safe until I can count my last days on one hand. Three more days to get through until I don't have to worry about life anymore."

"A theme that has always interested me is how women express anger, how women express violence. That is very much part of who women are, and it's so unaddressed. A vast amount of literature deals with cycles of violence about men, antiheroes. Women lack that vocabulary."

"Tampon commercial, detergent commercial, maxi pad commercial, windex commercial - you'd think all women do is clean and bleed."
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