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Roger Zelazny

"I enjoy slaughtering beasts, and I think of my relatives constantly."

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"I enjoy slaughtering beasts, and I think of my relatives constantly."

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A.E. Samaan

"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"

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A.E. Samaan

"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."

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A.E. Samaan

"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."

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A.E. Samaan

"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"

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A.E. Samaan

"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."

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A.E. Samaan

"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."

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A.E. Samaan

"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."

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A.E. Samaan

"Comedy strikes here... just to reduce pressure and depression."

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A.E. Samaan

"They're both bungholes who think they're too noble to shit."

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A.E. Samaan

"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."

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Roger Zelazny
"While I had often said that I wanted to die in bed, what I really meant was that in my old age I wanted to be stepped on by an elephant while making love."
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Roger Zelazny
"When you are about to die, a wombat is better than no company at all."
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Roger Zelazny
"I enjoy slaughtering beasts, and I think of my relatives constantly."
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Roger Zelazny
"I try to sit down at the typewriter four times a day, even if it's only five minutes, and write three sentences."
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Roger Zelazny
"It is a pain in the ass waiting around for someone to try to kill you."
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