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"If a woman's vagina was hell fire, then alot of sex maniacs would prefer to spend their eternity in hell."
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"Don't panic. Are you sitting? You probably don't need to sit. Well, possibly. At least lean on something."

"Ma'am,' Augustus said, nodding toward her, 'your daughter's car has just been deservedly egged by a blind man. Please close the door and go back inside or we'll be forced to call the police.' After wavering for a moment, Monica's mom closed the door and disappeared."

"At this, Gansey rolled over onto his back and folded his hands on his chest. He wore a salmon polo shirt, which, in Blue's opinion, was far more hellish than anything they'd discussed to this point."

"Lovemaking is a big grammatical error, i think it should be, LustMaking."

"If there was an elephant in the supermarket, she'd either not see it at all, or call it Mrs Jones and talk about fishcakes."

"I liked that he was a tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointments in the Department of Having a Voice that Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin."
Explore more quotes by Michael Bassey Johnson

"A little inhumanity does not describe you as heartless, rather, it is a way of telling others that you have a heart that can get angry."

"If you can't ignore imperfections, then your imaginary ideal soulmate will always remain pending till you grow old and die."

"When Albert Einstein told you to hide your source, he wasn't giving you a deliberate advice to conceal the root in which you're growing, but was to conceal the root from the eyes of people that will dare to uproot it."

"Insurgence and all forms of evil in a society doesn't describes her as a failure, but vividly shows a lack of love for one another."

"Even if you love a lady, don't say you will take care of her while someone else is catering for your needs."

"My friend is my friend, even if he wears rag, even if he wasn't born with a silver spoon, even if nobody wants to be his friend, i will hurt his critics by remaining his friend."

"Intelligence is a necessity, but when one is without a supernatural sense, intelligence becomes senseless."

"Don't be indifferent about any random idea that occurs to you, because each and every idea is for a particular purpose. it may not be beneficial to you, but can be what others are craving for."
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