"I am not a grammarian. Maybe my style is eccentric."

"Sodomy is in the Bible, to be read in churches. I wouldn't rule it out of Mr. Bruce's act if he cares to comment on it."

"Doorman - a genius who can open the door of your car with one hand, help you in with the other, and still have one left for the tip."

"My children have no prejudices at all. My own brother-in-law is Jewish!"

"Lenny Bruce is a very moral man trying to improve the world and trying to make audiences think."

"Things said to a reporter in confidence should be kept in confidence."

"I actually turned down an opportunity for a private interview with Adolph Hitler."

"I'm off to race around the world - a race against time and two men. I know I can beat time. I hope I can beat the men."