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"I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
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"If human equality is to be for ever averted - if the High, as we have called them, are to keep their places permanently - then the prevailing mental condition must be controlled insanity."
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Personal Development
"There are few things that we so unwillingly give up, even in advanced age, as the supposition that we still have the power of ingratiating ourselves with the fair sex."
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Personal Development
"The power of daring anything their fancy suggest, as always been conceded to the painter and the poet."
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Personal Development
"When you can flatten entire cities at a whim, a tendency towards quiet reflection and seeing-things-from-the-other-fellow's-point- of-view is seldom necessary."
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Personal Development
"Communism has never come to power in a country that was not disrupted by war or corruption, or both."
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Personal Development
"Will power is to the mind like a strong blind man who carries on his shoulders a lame man who can see."
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Personal Development
"War has always been the grand sagacity of every spirit which has grown too inward and too profound; its curative power lies even in the wounds one receives."
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Personal Development
"There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators."
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Personal Development
"The prayer of a righteous man avails much."
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Personal Development
"If all mankind minus one were of one opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
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"Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does."
Marriage
"Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough."
People
"I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a good book."
Television
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
Life
"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others."
Principle
"I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members."
People
"Humor is reason gone mad."
Humor
"My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one."
Mother
"Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?"
Marriage
"A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running."
Bed
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