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Derek Landy

"He liked murder. Murder and long walks had been two of his favorite things when he was younger."

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"He liked murder. Murder and long walks had been two of his favorite things when he was younger."

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Amber Hurdle

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."

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Amber Hurdle

"Southern DADDY-Dandy At Doin' Diapers Y'all!"

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Amber Hurdle

"GreenHollyWood is a bad character, fat, liking jokes, liking jokes about size, about the large, about the how big are you. Likes to laugh when you make a mistake, ... but but he is a teacher?! With a glasses a fat guy!"

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Amber Hurdle

"Good friends, very good what's the equation motherfucker???"

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Amber Hurdle

"They lack suggestive power. And when a book lacks suggestive power, however hard it hits the surface of the mind it cannot penetrate within."

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Amber Hurdle

"To me she said, "It's this stupid gotcha thing, they've been doing it for weeks now. Leaping out at each other and us, scaring the hell out of everyone.""It's a game of wits," Bert said to me."Half-wits," Kristy added."

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Amber Hurdle

"I think that in the future, clocks won't say three o'clock anymore. They'll just get right to the point and rename three o'clock 'Pepsi.'"

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Amber Hurdle

"A woman is always better in everything with the mouth, she talks a lot."

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Amber Hurdle

"He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."

Explore more quotes by Derek Landy

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Derek Landy
"She had been a teenager once, and she knew that, despite the apparent contradictions, a person's teenage years lasted well into their fifties."
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Derek Landy
"I mean you ACRES of harm,' Dalrymple growled. 'Untold QUANTITIES of harm. I will visit a whole CONTINENT of harm upon you before we are through."
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Derek Landy
"If anyone stops us, as long as we mumble something pretentious about the glory of death, we should be fine."
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Derek Landy
"But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake."
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Derek Landy
"I swear, talking to you is like talking to a really good-looking and mildly stupid brick wall."
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Derek Landy
"You should have called us. Desmond would have picked you up.''No I wouldn't,' Valkyrie's dad said, stepping into earshot. 'Sorry, Fletcher, but I had important fatherly duties to take care of, which included eating breakfast, showering, and finding my trousers. Of those three, I only managed two. Without looking down, can you guess which one I missed?'... Fletcher smiled back. 'I just want to borrow Stephanie for a moment.''Take our daughter,' Valkryie's dad said, waving a hand airily. 'We have another one now."
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Derek Landy
"He crouched at the car window and looked in. 'What a lovely family you have. What a charming family. They're all lovely. Except for that one.' His finger jabbed the glass. 'That one's a bit ugly."
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Derek Landy
"Tanith frowned. Did people still go on DATES any more? She was sure they did. They probably called it something different though. She tried to think of the last date she'd been on. The last PROPER date. Did fighting side by side with Saracen Rue count as a date? They ended up snuggling under the moonlight, drenched in gore and pieces of brain - so it had PROBABLY been a date. If it wasn't, it was certainly a fun time had by all. Well, not ALL. But she and Saracen had sure had a blast."
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Derek Landy
"Being a detective isn't all about torture and murder and monsters. Sometimes it gets truly unpleasant...The fate of the world may depend on whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your relatives."
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Derek Landy
"It would be fun, Skulduggery nodded. I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like."
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