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"I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality."
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Exlpore more Work quotes

"The world system is employment."

"Employers are at their happiest on Mondays. Employees are at their happiest on Fridays."

"Work was intended not to give a man a reason to live, but rather to give him a means to live."

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Explore more quotes by Mitch Hedberg

"I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality."

"I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late."

"My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'"
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