"Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day."

Father, Dad, Mother, Wife, Day

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"Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day."

Exlpore more Father quotes

"My dad named me Dakota and my mom came up with my first name Hannah. So it's Hannah Dakota Fanning."

Dakota Fanning, American Actress

Father, Dad, Mom, First, Name

"I am so excited to extend myself behind the scenes as a designer and to - as my father puts it - finally have a real job."

Lady Gaga, American Musician

Father, Job

"My dad says I could sing before I could talk, if that's possible. I was always humming and things like that."

Miley Cyrus, American Musician

Father, Dad, Talk

"My father bought me a little cardboard accordion, and when I was three I got this little machine."

Toots Thielemans, Belgian Musician

Father, Machine

"My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that."

Paul Lynde, American Comedian

Father, Dad, Trust, Women, Sons

"My father is the jailhouse. My father is your system... I am only what you made me. I am only a reflection of you."

Charles Manson, American Criminal

Father, Reflection

"In the original draft I was 27 and Peter was 55 in the script. That's not the same as a guy in his 40s and a dad in the end of his 70s. It's a different point in both our lives."

Paul Reiser, American Comedian

Father, Dad, Draft, End

"I'm in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on the One-Hit Wonder Wall. I'm still very troubled by the fact that I'm in the hall and my dad isn't."

Debby Boone, American Actress

Father, Dad, Fact, Fame, Wonder

"She encouraged any artistic impulse I had, and my father discouraged any artistic impulse I had. They took out their problems with each other on me and my sister."

Bill Griffith, American Cartoonist

Father, Sister, Problems

"Since I was a boy, from this house, I was out rescuing crocodiles and snakes. My mum and dad were very passionate about that and, I was lucky enough to go along."

Steve Irwin, Australian Scientist

Father, Dad

Explore more quotes by Jay Leno

"The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most."

People

"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."

Men

"Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of LA in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers."

People

"You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch."

War

"You're not famous until my mother has heard of you."

Mother

"The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets."

Crime

"The Pentagon still has not given a name to the Iraqi war. Somehow 'Operation Re-elect Bush' doesn't seem to be popular."

War

"Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution."

Life

"More coming out about Saddam Hussein. We now know he takes Viagra and he has as many as six mistresses. No wonder Congress is reluctant to take action against this guy - he's one of their own."

Action

"For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make overweight the average then? Last month you were fat, now you're average - hey, let's get a pizza!"

Time