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"I had this guy's file pulled this morning, along with the rest of your neighbors. His name is Desperado.Pause. A few seconds passed. He was waiting for my reaction.'Did you say Desperado? I couldn't stop the snort of laughter that bubbled to the surface. 'Yeah, the Director confirmed. 'He changed his name when he turned eighteen. It was Melvin.I was still laughing. 'Cause Desperado is so much better than Melvin."
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"A tie is what you get after ice cubes have wrestled with hot water."

"Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions."

"The moment you have a self at all, there is a possibility of putting yourself first - wanting to be the centre - wanting to be God, in fact. That was the sin of Satan: and that was the sin he taught the human race. Some people think the fall of man had something to do with sex, but that is a mistake...what Satan put into the heads of our remote ancestors was the idea that they 'could be like Gods' - could set up on their own as if they had created themselves - be their own masters - invent some sort of happiness for themselves outside God, apart from God. And out of that hopeless attempt has come...the long terrible story of man trying to find something other than God which will make him happy."

"I used to think that size does not count, until I realized that most people either find other people's faeces more disgusting than a bird's droppings, or they do not find the latter disgusting at all."

"Playing Solitaire is a non-smoking employee's smoke break."
Explore more quotes by Laura Kreitzer

"I blinked at him just casually talking about my new sex life with his genie-shiny head, and I knew at any second I would break into hysterics."

"It hurts, Summer cries, head shaking back and forth. 'Please, make it stop. Sweat beads on her forehead.'What hurts? Cameron asks.'My eyes.Summer's eyes open. Everyone gasps. They're no longer blue; they appear bionic, like a circuit board's inside her eyes. Panicked now, Summer reaches for her face. 'What is it? What's wrong?"

"What are you doing? Egnatious asked, eyebrows furrowed as he watched Gabriella do a flip.Firen mimicked Gabriella and turned to Egnatious. 'Fun times. Go with it. She didn't even crack a smile, though her body language said she was laughing on the inside.Instead of following their act, Egnatious simply dove for an outcrop just as it began moving away. He nearly lost his balance, but Firen caught his flailing arms.'Are you having a seizure or something? she jested, displaying a rare vein of humor.Egnatious sent her a queasy glare."

"A layer of fine powder coats his skin.'My lungs are turning to concrete, Rob wheezes, hacking and spitting.'So are my eyes. How do I always get roped into these things? Avery coughs and pats Rob's back in sympathy. A poof of dust billows from the contact."

"It's complicated, I said in defense, hands going up to show surrender.'Talk slowly, Jenna retorted derisively.'Okay, I deserved that, I admitted."

"Why aren't you smiling? Cameron asks. She picks up the Astropad and stops the video.'Because this is the beginning, not the end."

"Terror builds inside him. The reality that tonight will be his last leaves a sour taste in his mouth. The Tainted will eat him, or on a more terrifying note-if that's even possible-maybe turn him into one of them. He'd rather die. But first, he'll take as many of those bastards out as he can. He throws his pack into the throng and jerks the blade from his belt. With a thudding heart, he slices through them. Blood arcs over him, onto him."

"She would rather remain silent, but her voice is no longer something to fear. It's strong. Powerful. A weapon of emotions."
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