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"Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about."
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"Some books sold because they are (said to be) great. Some are (said to be) great because they sold."
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"The world has become sad because a puppet was once melancholy. The nihilist, that strange martyr who has no faith, who goes to the stake without enthusiasm, and dies for what he does not believe in, is a purely literary product. He was invented by Turgenev, and completed by Dostoevsky. Robespierre came out of the pages of Rousseau as surely as the People's Palace rose out debris of a novel. Literature always anticipates life. It does not copy it, but moulds it to its purpose."
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"Literature always anticipates life. It doesn't copy it but moulds it to it's purpose."
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"This would be...a book that would be a trapdoor down into some place dark. A place only you could go, alone, when you opened the cover. Because only books have that power."
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"A good novel tells us the truth about its hero, but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author."
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"No, said Bran. "I haven't. And if I have it doesn't matter. Sometimes Old Nan would tell the same story she'd told before, but we never minded, if it was a good story. Old stories are like old friends, she used to say. You have to visit them from time to time."
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"Like someone excitedly relating a story, only to find the words petering out, the path gets narrower the further I go, the undergrowth taking over."
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"Books are well written, or badly written. That is all."
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"For what was it about books that once finished left the reader in a bit of a haze and made them reread the last few sentences in order to continue the ringing in their hearts a while longer, so as not to let the silence illumine the fact that reading, they had gained something - distance, a lesson, a companion, a new world - but now, after the last full stop, they had lost something palpable and felt a little emptier than before."
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"Do you understand now why books are hated and feared? Because they reveal the pores on the face of life. The comfortable people want only the faces of the full moon, wax, faces without pores, hairless, expressionless."
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Explore more quotes by Joseph Heller

"I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any."
Time

"Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them."
People

"There was only one catch and that was Catch-22. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to."
Want

"Rise above principle and do what's right."
Morality

"Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about."
Literature

"But that was war. Just about all he could find in its favor was that it paid well and liberated children from the pernicious influence of their parents."
War

"Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them."
Man

"I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long."
Dream

"Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck."
Destiny

"The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on."
Enemy
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