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Jay Leno

"The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up."

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"The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up."

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Amber Hurdle

"I think seeing some of the past can be helpful, especially if you're into crime solving."

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Amber Hurdle

"Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies."

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Amber Hurdle

"Crime is a product of social excess."

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Amber Hurdle

"I am looking forward to a series of productive meetings in both Austria and Estonia, particularly what role organized crime plays in the Baltic drug trade."

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Amber Hurdle

"But in my district I have heard from law enforcement officials and across the State of Florida about how much this JAG funding helps them fight crime, and to protect and serve the citizens within their jurisdiction."

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Amber Hurdle

"As governor, there isn't a lot I can do beyond that to crack down on crime. Law enforcement is really a local issue. It's the cops' job to tighten down on criminals."

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Amber Hurdle

"I've been very clear. I won. I didn't commit the crime."

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Amber Hurdle

"Too much sensibility creates unhappiness and too much insensibility creates crime."

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Amber Hurdle

"The Holocaust was the most evil crime ever committed."

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Amber Hurdle

"We also have to stop the flow of precursor chemicals that meth cooks use to boil up this poison."

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Jay Leno
"If God doesn't destroy Hollywood Boulevard, he owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology."
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Jay Leno
"I think high self-esteem is overrated. A little low self-esteem is actually quite good. Maybe you're not the best, so you should work a little harder."
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Jay Leno
"If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: Pour a little Lavoris in the toilet."
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Jay Leno
"The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets."
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Jay Leno
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it."
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Jay Leno
"According to New York publishers, Bill Clinton will get more money for his book than Hillary Clinton got for hers. Well, duh. At least his book has some sex in it."
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Jay Leno
"Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!"
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Jay Leno
"Today, one year after their divorce, Pamela and Tommy Lee announced they're getting back together. You know what that means? There's still hope for Ike and Tina Turner."
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Jay Leno
"You know what they should call this war - Son of Bush vs. Son of a Bitch."
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Jay Leno
"Al Jazeera aired a new tape of Osama bin Laden. It was the usual stuff, he called Bush evil, the Great Satan, called him a war monger. Basically, the same thing you heard at last night's Democratic debate."
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