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"Money is a good servant, but a poor master."
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"There's a correlation between the number of digits on a man's bank balance, and, the number of things that his woman is willing to forgive him for."
"The Bible does not say money is the root of all evil; it says the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil. A poor man who, in his heart, worships the idea of being rich is more vulnerable to its evils than a rich man who has a heart to use it all for the Lord."
"Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated."
"If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them."
"Among other possibilities, money was invented to make it possible for a foolish man to control wise men; a weak man, strong men; a child, old men; an ignorant man, knowledgeable men; and for a dwarf to control giants."
"Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth."
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