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Allan Carr

"I hate Shakespeare. I think Shakespeare's rubbish."

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"I hate Shakespeare. I think Shakespeare's rubbish."

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"I hate the word 'sneering', I can't help the way my face looks."

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"I hate the irreverent rabble and keep them far from me."

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"The correlative to loving our neighbors as ourselves is hating ourselves as we hate our neighbors."

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"I never storyboard. I hate it. I don't understand why so many directors want to make comic strips of their films."

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"I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it."

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"I hate the word wholesome."

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"I have no television - I hate it."

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"I hate this image of me as a prim Edwardian. I want to shock everyone."

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"I never liked guns, I hate them, I always blink before they go off."

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"Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar."

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Allan Carr
"I was at college doing performing arts, and just spending all my time mucking about, and the lecturers thought I would be pretty good at stand-up, so I gave it a whirl."
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Allan Carr
"I've met Nicole Kidman, Elton John, loads of people."
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Allan Carr
"I like old people falling over, that's what makes me laugh."
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Allan Carr
"I went to Montreal. My first gig went very badly. They just weren't laughing at anything. I found out they were a load of Christians, and it was a gig to raise money for a new church roof."
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Allan Carr
"I didn't really want to be a comedian."
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Allan Carr
"I'd love to do acting, but it'd definitely have to be comedy. I can't do serious. It's completely beyond me."
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Allan Carr
"If you go on stage with the wrong attitude, or something in your performance is off, you can lose an audience in the first minute. That first minute is crucial."
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Allan Carr
"You should never meet your heroes. Paul Newman... I was so excited about meeting him, but he turned up in shell suit bottoms, slippers, and a jumper. He was just so worn out and old, he wanted to go home."
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Allan Carr
"I think over there in Montreal they're a bit hardcore with the old homos. They're not that keen on them."
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Allan Carr
"I still get excited about meeting celebrities, because I don't think I'm a celebrity myself."
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