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"Egotism, n: Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle with a pen."
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Exlpore more Vanity quotes
"Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth."
"Beauty is wasted on the self-absorbed."
"Our vanity is hardest to wound precisely when our pride has just been wounded."
"When we see that almost everything men devote their lives to attain, sparing no effort and encountering a thousand toils and dangers in the process, has, in the end, no further object than to raise themselves in the estimation of others; when we see that not only offices, titles, decorations, but also wealth, nay, even knowledge[1] and art, are striven for only to obtain, as the ultimate goal of all effort, greater respect from one's fellowmen,-is not this a lamentable proof of the extent to which human folly can go?"
Explore more quotes by Ambrose Bierce
"Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of thinking he has got what he ought not to have, and is deprived of nothing except what was justly his due."
"Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking."
"NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi."
"I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats."
"Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain."
"Insurance - an ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table."
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