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"You guys gotta get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father."
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"Most parents are not really 'supportive' because they want their kid(s) to succeed; they 'support' their kid(s) as an attempt to avoid appearing to have bred a failure, or, failures - in the eyes of their peers and/or neighbours."

"Spanking a child is about the parent not the child. The child will learn more from positive correction than physical manipulation."

"Passing their toilet training is the very last thing that some adults did that has made their parents proud of them."

"The answer to the question 'How many children do you have?' and the one to the question 'How many children are you raising?' are not identical in all cases: some men are not taking care of their own children, some are knowingly or unknowingly raising other men's children, and some do not even know that they each have a child, another child, or other children."

"Roger speaking to Brianna: It's too important. You don't forget having a dad."You do remember your father?"No. I remember yours."

"Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath."

"Darling, my darling, don't think that I don't love you or that I didn't love you, but it's precisely because I love you that I couldn't have become what I am today if you were still here. It's impossible to have a child and despise the world as it is, because that's the world we've put the child into. The child makes us care about the world, think about it's future, willingly join in its racket and its turmoils, take its incurable stupidity seriously."

"It's a fool who thinks that having a kid is a right, which is the biggest crock of fishheads I've ever heard. You have a responsibility, not only to a person but also to a spirit because that's what a child is. A pissing, crying, yawning, giggling, laughing package of spirit that is looking for you to take the lead. It's a heck of a responsibility to look after a spirit."
Explore more quotes by Lois Greiman

"Some people are street-smart, some people are book-smart, but most people are just dumber than dirt."

"Just when you think you have life by the tail, it's likely to whip around and take a hunk outta your balls."

"Men are like beer. Some are bold and some are smooth. But every damn one of 'em has a big-ass head full of air."

"In the movie business, the ones we call Lucky are usually those idiots who are just too damn stubborn to take no for an answer. Come to think of it, the movie business is kind of like life."

"There isn't much a pan of warm Brownies and a glass of milk will fix. In less it's low grain prices. Or poverty. Or the national debt. I guess there are a few things, but nothing you have to worry about right this minute."

"Honesty is the best policy. But insanity is a hell of a lot more effective in court. So your set, McMullen."
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