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"Women should be obscene and not heard."
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"Women are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until we are in hot water!"

"Imagine, a September 11 with weapons of mass destruction. It's not 3,000. It's tens of thousands of innocent men, women and children."

"What Democratic congressmen do to their women staffers, Republican congressmen do to the country."

"The superiority of one man's opinion over another's is never so great as when the opinion is about a woman."

"Women are clear-headed, they are more creative and for this reason, sometimes, also more fragile."
Explore more quotes by Groucho Marx

"The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths."

"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."

"Please accept my resignation. I don't care to belong to any club that will have me as a member."

"I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."
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