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"Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist."
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"We ought to know that all people are not the same and so we must not expect the same attitude from all people. Different people behave differently and that is what makes different people different."
"If you have carefully examined hundred people you met in your life journey, it means that you have read hundred different books! Every person you know is a book; world is full of walking books; some are boring, some are marvellous, some are weak, some are powerful, but they are all useful because they all carry different experiences of different paths!"
"Texas has arguably the most extreme separation between the well off and everyday people in the United States."
"People often become actresses because of something they dislike about themselves: They pretend they are someone else."
"Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them."
"It only takes five people in black robes to determine such crucial issues for our country as abortion, pornography, same-sex 'marriage,' and religious liberties."
"It is dishonest the way that people suddenly think they've found guitars, and wear their guitar as a badge."
"I think that people ran out of oxygen and don't really know what happened up there, maybe some of them just made things up because they weren't sure what had happened."
Explore more quotes by Jeff Foxworthy
"My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family."
"Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work."
"The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him."
"People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school."
"Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming in through the cat door."
"I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end of the round because I'd spent about half the day in the woods."
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