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"School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man."
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"In order that all men may be taught to speak the truth, it is necessary that all likewise should learn to hear it."
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Personal Development
"Opposition may become sweet to a man when he has christened it persecution."
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Personal Development
"A little skill in antiquity inclines a man to Popery."
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Personal Development
"In the course of history, men come to see that iron necessity is neither iron nor necessary."
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Personal Development
"A man in passion rides a horse that runs away with him."
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Personal Development
"The man who looks for security, even in the mind, is like a man who would chop off his limbs in order to have artificial ones which will give him no pain or trouble."
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Personal Development
"There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in."
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Personal Development
"The dons of Oxford and Cambridge are too busy educating the young men to be able to teach them anything."
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Personal Development
"Men should not try to overstrain their goodness more than any other faculty, bodily or mental."
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Personal Development
"In the last analysis, even the best man is evil: in the last analysis, even the best woman is bad."
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"There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments."
Woman
"If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty."
Woman
"Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing."
Being
"Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?"
Love
"Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!"
Dance
"Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to."
People
"Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of the final four."
Sports
"I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson."
Business
"Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them."
Movies
"I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity."
Life
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