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"When young people are cynical, and snarky, they shoot down their own future. When you keep saying "No," all that's left is what other people said "Yes" to before you were born. Really, "No" is no choice at all."
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"I guess the painkillers wipe out your memory along with your ethics."
"I am most proud of my integrity and least proud of my cynicism."
"I've given up men. It's true. At first, I was just going to give up attorneys, but that seemed immature - and far too exclusive, so I'm playing it safe and giving up all the penis-carrying humans."
"All these handsome guys are the same. When they're done combing their goddam hair, they beat it on you."
"It is through experience that I have lost faith in USA law enforcement."
"I know more damn perverts, at schools and all, than anybody you ever met, and they're always being perverty when I'm around."
"Really high-minded people are indifferent to happiness, especially other people's."
"The more expensive a school is, the more crooks it has - I'm not kidding."
"Heaven. The biggest waste of our time we ever invented, outside jigsaws."
Explore more quotes by Caitlin Moran
"We're supposed to speak from the heart in what we wear. We have to find capsule wardrobes."
"It's difficult to see the glass ceiling because it's made of glass. Virtually invisible. What we need is for more birds to fly above it and shit all over it, so we can see it properly."
"The people around you are mirrors, I think. You see yourself reflected in their eyes. If the mirror is true, and smooth, you see your true self. That's how you learn who you are."
"Personally, I feel the time has come for women to introduce their own Zero Tolerance policy on the Broken Window issues in our lives - I want a Zero Tolerance policy on "All the Patriarchal Bullshit."
"Sitting in seat 14A, in the sun, I float on a full-moon, tidal joy unlike anything I've ever experienced. I am getting incredibly high on a single, astounding fact: that it's always sunny above the clouds. Always. That every day on Earth- every day I have ever had- was secretly sunny after all....I feel like I've just flown 600 miles per hour head-on into the most beautiful metaphor of my life: If you fly high enough, if you get above the clouds, it's never-ending summer."
"I want a Zero Tolerance policy on All The Patriarchal Bullshit."
"Because this injunction for all women to have children isn't in any way logical. If you take a moment to consider the state of the world, the thing you notice is that there are plenty of babies being born; the planet really doesn't need all of us to produce more babies."
"One of the great things about being a writer/journalist is that my boss loves me to go out and do features on being someone else. I did a feature on Kate Middleton, where I went to an incredible fancy state home in the countryside, put on a wedding dress and posed for engagement pictures with a fake Prince William."
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