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Mark Twain

"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it."

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"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it."

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"The negative way of thinking based on constant complaints, strains, and objections of discontent steals our energy."

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"Words don't have the power to hurt you, unless that person meant more to you than you are willing to confess."

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"Who has fear? The one who has greed has fear."

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"For how long are the people who seek for the approval of others keep putting their self-worth in the hands of people?"

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"Visiting the sick' is an orgasm of superiority in the contemplation of our neighbor's helplessness."

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"Physiology and Psychology are not at all separate from each other. Rather they are deeply intertwined."

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"Overriding the old information in your mind with new information is easy, but to actually go further than just putting a veneer over your old mindset is the way forward."

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"We sometimes try to impress people we just met by not trying to impress them."

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"I'm sorry, but I do hate this differentiation between the sexes. 'The modern girl has a thoroughly businesslike attitude to life' That sort of thing. It's not a bit true! Some girls are businesslike and some aren't. Some men are sentimental and muddle-headed, others are clear-headed and logical. There are just different types of brains."

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"Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do."
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"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."
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"In the afternoon the ship's company assembled aft, on deck, under the awnings; the flute, the asthmatic meodeon, and the consumptive clarinet crippled the Star Spangled Banner, the choir chased it to cover, and George came in with a peculiarly lacerating screech on the final note and slaughtered it. Nobody mourned. We carried out the corpse on three cheers (that joke was not intentional and I do not endorse it)."
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"When I am king they shall not have bread and shelter only, but also teachings out of books, for a full belly is little worth where the mind is starved."
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"One should never use exclamation points in writing. It is like laughing at your own joke."
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"The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little."
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"Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside."
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"Don't use a five-dollar word when a fifty-cent word will do."
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"Schoolboy days are no happier than the days of afterlife, but we look back upon them regretfully because we have forgotten our punishments at school and how we grieved when our marbles were lost and our kites destroyed - because we have forgotten all the sorrows and privations of the canonized ethic and remember only its orchard robberies, its wooden-sword pageants, and its fishing holidays."
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"T[he rules of writing] require that the personages in a tale shall be alive, except in the case of corpses, and that always the reader shall be able to tell the corpses from the others."
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