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"You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy."
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"The condition you're in at this moment is the product of your previous thoughts, to change your condition, change your thoughts."
Personal Development
"Instead of clinging to the only Lifeboat that can save, we have tossed overboard biblical truths in the name of [compromise], living on the edge of life, like the man who rides the parameter of a hurricane, daring it to sweep him away."
"There is always a path to our target, the problem is to discover it!"
"Money isn't the solution to your problems. It only lets you carry your unhappiness around in style."
"From a cleansed conscience emerges a changed life."
"Simple things have greater power than the complicated things!"
"If he did not speak his tale, it grew dank and musty, it shrank inside him, while with the telling the tale stayed fresh and virtuous."
Explore more quotes by Neil Simon
"Take care of him. And make him feel important. And if you can do that, you'll have a happy and wonderful marriage. Like two out of every ten couples."
"Everyone thinks they can write a play; you just write down what happened to you. But the art of it is drawing from all the moments of your life."
"Nathan Lane always wanted to play Oscar. When he came in the first day, he already knew his lines. He said he'd known them since he was 18."
"I love living. I have some problems with my life, but living is the best thing they've come up with so far."
"Sports is the only entertainment where, no matter how many times you go back, you never know the ending."
"You must realize that honorary degrees are given generally to people whose SAT scores were too low to get them into schools the regular way. As a matter of fact, it was my SAT scores that led me into my present vocation in life, comedy."
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