"I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did."

Father, Dad

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"I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did."

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"President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is actually quite liberal. Karl Rove said if his father wasn't a Nazi, he wouldn't have any credibility with conservatives at all."

Bill Maher, American Comedian

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"I may neither choose who I would, nor refuse who I dislike; so is the will of a living daughter curbed by the will of a dead father."

William Shakespeare, English Dramatist

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"To he who avenges a father, nothing is impossible."

Pierre Corneille, French Dramatist

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"I am blessed to have Mom and Dad."

Kevin Eubanks, American Musician

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"I'm from Brooklyn. I grew up very poor- seven people, four rooms. My dad had no education."

Peter Criss, American Musician

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"My dad is a really honest, hardworking, straight guy."

Joe Lando, American Actor

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"Father is Everyone's First Preceptor.Happy Father's Day!"

Mohith Agadi, Indian Poet

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"My sister and I said, Dad, are you doing to do anything about that? And he mentioned treatments other people sent him that he'd been working on. So we thought it would be kind of cool to give these guys a real script."

Rae Dawn Chong, American Actress

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"The Rat Pack was the piece that really kicked me out of that little funk that I was in and then Ted called me up and asked me if I wanted to be the dad in Blow."

Ray Liotta, American Actor

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"But you know, my dad called me the laziest white kid he ever met. When I screamed back at him that he was putting down a race of people to call me lazy, his answer was that's not what he was doing, and that I was also the dumbest white kid he ever met."

Norman Lear, American Producer

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Explore more quotes by Jeff Foxworthy

"Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?"

Baby

"Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip."

People

"My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this."

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"Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money, that's a bonus, and if you don't, you still won't hate going to work."

Life

"You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more."

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"The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more."

Years

"I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together."

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"If men have a smell it's usually an accident."

Men

"If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck."

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"Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on."

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