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Clement Freud

"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer."

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"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer."

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Amber Hurdle

"I was drawn to all the wrong things: I liked to drink, I was lazy, I didn't have a god, politics, ideas, ideals. I was settled into nothingness; a kind of non-being, and I accepted it. I didn't make for an interesting person. I didn't want to be interesting, it was too hard. What I really wanted was only a soft, hazy space to live in, and to be left alone. On the other hand, when I got drunk I screamed, went crazy, got all out of hand. One kind of behavior didn't fit the other. I didn't care."

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Amber Hurdle

"I used to love youI still doSo SelfishI love the old youThe you that didnt shoot drugs...The you that didnt get beat on by menYou laugh in my face and call me a foolBut its trueI still love youSometimes,I can see the old youWhen your eyes flashWhen you almost look alive."

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Amber Hurdle

"I guess my biggest problem is that I find it easier to relapse than to carry through."

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Amber Hurdle

"I knew that I no longer wanted to take junk. If I could have made one decision, it would have been no more junk, ever, but when it came to the process of quitting I did not have the drive. It gave me a terrible feeling of helplessness to watch myself break every schedule I set up, as though I did not have control over my actions."

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Amber Hurdle

"Once I knew nothing about McKay and now I knew everything about him. This seemed as good as any reason for not walking out the door. There are so many ways to stop the knowing, and I tried them all. I tried silence, I tried heroin, I tried calling it love. And then I stopped trying to call my dumbness any one of ten thousand names."

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Amber Hurdle

"Gately can't even imagine what it would be like to be a sober and drug-free biker. It's like what would be the point. He imagines these people polishing the hell out of their leather and like playing a lot of really precise pool."

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Amber Hurdle

"A lot of people who find out about the things I do immediately figure I'm just a pathetic 'druggie' with nothing to say that is worth hearing. They talk endless bull shit of 'recovery!' They make it sound like some amazing discovery...don't they know I'm far too busy trying to recover me?"

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Amber Hurdle

"Your personal will is the web your disease sits and spins in. The will you call your own ceased to be yours as of who knows how many Substance-drenched years ago."

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Amber Hurdle

"What is addiction? Only those that have been kept secret, are addictions. Those that are openly visible cannot be called addiction."

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Amber Hurdle

"Some people are so addicted to their misery that they will destroy anything that gets in the way of their fix."

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Clement Freud
"I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men."
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Clement Freud
"Congealed fat is pretty much the same, irrespective of the delicacy around which it is concealed."
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Clement Freud
"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer."
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