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"Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex."
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"Sex and love represent one of the numerous absurdities and hopeless incongruences demarking human nature. A person whom only seeks out sex and eschews love will live a barren existence. Sex without love is a brute display of physical reproductive capacity. Sex is not a worthless or stupid activity when it forms a cog in a loving and affectionate relationship. Sex and love might not make the world go round, but when joined they make it a better place to live in."
"Pornography is the attempt to insult sex, to do dirt on it."
"If you insist upon fighting to protect me, or 'our' country, let it be understood soberly and rationally between us that you are fighting to gratify a sex instinct which I cannot share; to procure benefits where I have not shared and probably will not share."
"Okay we both know... what happens... with sex... different places... different time... different date... different rooms... the biatch is still bitchy.... very bitchy as pitchy.... The agony - DOOOOOO YOU FEEL IT?- wE JUST PREDICTED THE FUTURE!"
"When coming to sex: First served, first come."
Explore more quotes by Bill Maher
"President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is actually quite liberal. Karl Rove said if his father wasn't a Nazi, he wouldn't have any credibility with conservatives at all."
"Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the "will of the people" goes out the window."
"I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder."
"Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake - you know, to send the right message to kids."
"The country has become much more conservative, partly because it's been taken over by the religious right."
"We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep and conformists."
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