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"I don't read books."
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"Never loan a book to someone if you expect to get it back. Loaning books is the same as giving them away."

"All good books have one thing in common - they are truer than if they had really happened."

"A morning-glory at my window satisfies me more than the metaphysics of books."

"I have personally seen statements that were longer than some books I have read."

"Let this little book be thy friend, if, owing to fortune or through thine own fault, thou canst not find a dearer companion."
Explore more quotes by Eric Bristow

"The Crafty Cockney had a picture of the owner dressed up as a copper, so I brought it home, wore it on TV and the name just stuck."

"All this cuddling and kissing on stage these days, well it's all right in football when someone scores a goal, but not when you're playing darts."

"It took me about 10 years to get rid of. I'm all right now, though, lovely, I'm throwing some nice darts at the moment, but every now and then I get a bit of a jump. I wish I could find a cure, I'd make a bloody fortune."

"Nah, I don't watch TV either, apart from a few sports programmes. I just don't have the time."

"I've got a nice little crafty deal with the people in Barbados; 10 days out there teaching the locals how to play darts for an hour a day. Get paid for that as well."

"Trouble is, I don't get to play a lot at the moment because I've just signed a contract where I've got to do 200 shows a year in pubs, so the golf's fallen away a bit."
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