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"Fool me once, shame on youfool me twice, shame on mefool me thrice, I'm gonna get the frying pan!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life:~people applaud you incessantly.~love you more than their parents.~give you a daily bread."
Author Name
Personal Development
"One who has both feet firmly planted in the air."
Author Name
Personal Development
"My religion consists of laughing at myself. My motto is this: As long as there is a me, there is a reason to laugh out loud!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"Well, that depends, I suppose. I heard someone once say that men dance the same way they have sex. So, if you want everyone here to think you're the kind of guy who just sits around and-" He stood up. "Let's dance."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The cleverest woman finds a need for foolish admirers."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual."
Author Name
Personal Development
"She breathed an enormous sigh, looked at Poirot, Looked away, and suddenly blurted out, "You're too old. Nobody told me you were so old. I really don't want to be rude but - there it is. You're too old. I'm really sorry." She turned abruptly and blundered out of the room, rather like a desperate moth in lamplight. Poirot, his mouth open, heard the bang of the front door. He ejaculated: "Non d'un nom d'un nom..."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I was my own boss, but that all changed the day I got married."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Could you hold the chainsaw a bit closer to your mouth, please?"
Author Name
Personal Development
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"I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox."
Love
"Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness."
Education
"If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job."
Job
"Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there."
Mistake
"If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative."
Now
"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead."
Food
"I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown."
People
"Having sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."
Relationship
"Marriage is the death of hope."
Death
"Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable."
Life
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