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"Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid."
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"If you have tears, prepare to shed them now."
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Personal Development
"Do not postpone your problems, solve them now! Because tomorrow you might be weaker than today and there might arise additional problems! Unsheathe your sword now; forget tomorrow, time is now!"
Author Name
Personal Development
"The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing."
Author Name
Personal Development
"If you're not failing every now and again, it's a sign you're not doing anything very innovative."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I had redesigned my entire amplifier system for this tour because airlines are very strict now."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It will be a difficult couple of days. It's difficult now and it will be difficult tomorrow."
Author Name
Personal Development
"It is correct that I overlooked the contamination of the party, not just now but also in the past."
Author Name
Personal Development
"So now what happens is the cameras follow me around and capture exactly what I've been doing since I was a boy. Only now we have a team of, you know, like 73 of us, and it's gone beyond that."
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Personal Development
"If I were to write Web now, it would be a much, much darker book."
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Personal Development
"Damn the sword! When Virginia wanted a sword, I gave her one. Now she sends me a toy! I require bread!"
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Personal Development
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"We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective."
Society
"Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it."
Life
"Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting."
Humor
"And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West."
Society
"American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it."
Humor
"As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula."
Humor
"I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories."
Society
"The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes."
Religion
"If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland."
Humor
"It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate."
Body
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