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"If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins."
Gold,
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"Most orgies that you go to, I have found, most of it is sad. All that wildness, all those laughs were like the shining silver and gold paper on packages, but there was nothing inside."
Author Name
Personal Development
"The greatest memory for me of the 1984 Olympics was not the individual honors, but standing on the podium with my teammates to receive our team gold medal."
Author Name
Personal Development
"You know you can get gaudy with something, and they didn't do that. To me, I think it's very tasteful, well done, with the silver and gold and the engraving. I think it's very tasteful."
Author Name
Personal Development
"As far as the Russians were concerned, I felt the reverse; they had adequate gold, if they wanted to buy, and they weren't dependent upon international trade. I felt they were more self-sufficient."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I've spent, I think, close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Frank Marth also played many characters with us, and like George Petrie, he was worth his weight in gold."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Even when I was very depressed, I could hold on to something. It seems that I have always had that streak of gold that I could hold on to."
Author Name
Personal Development
"I wouldn't say that there's ever been an Olympic champion that didn't deserve to win an Olympic Gold Medal."
Author Name
Personal Development
"Praise, like gold and diamonds, owes its value only to its scarcity."
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Personal Development
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"If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 gold coins."
Gold
"I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do."
Time
"90% of every art form is garbage - dance and stand-up, painting and music. Focus on the 10% that's good, suck it up, and drive on."
Art
"I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians."
Death
"I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it out if me with steel pipes."
Romantic
"I've hung out in the writer's room a few times, but the fact is we've got such a good writing staff, I don't want to get my peanut butter fingerprints on anything."
Fact
"It's like our country is being run by a bunch of bad alcoholic dads right now."
Being
"I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were relaxed enough to start becoming personal on stage."
Being
"I think I realized it was an art form at the beginning, but it took me a really long time before I was able to view what I was performing myself as an art form."
Art
"I hate all sidekicks."
Hate
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