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"I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine."
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"A man's face as a rule says more, and more interesting things, than his mouth, for it is a compendium of everything his mouth will ever say, in that it is the monogram of all this man's thoughts and aspirations."

"It was such a lovely day I thought it a pity to get up."

"But if thought corrupts language, language can also corrupt thought."

"I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library."
Explore more quotes by Spike Milligan


"I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke."
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