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Tom Lehrer

"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up."

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"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up."

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Amber Hurdle

"For us in Russia communism is a dead dog. For many people in the West, it is still a living lion."

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Amber Hurdle

"They're talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that's used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can't even smoke in bed."

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Amber Hurdle

"Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake - you know, to send the right message to kids."

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Amber Hurdle

"The tea baggers. The one thing they hate is when you call them racist. The other thing they hate is black people. But they won't say it."

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Amber Hurdle

"Good-looking people with strong, fluoridated teeth get things handed to them on platters."

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Amber Hurdle

"With Google I'm starting to burn out on knowing the answer to everything. People in the year 2020 are going to be nostalgic for the sensation of feeling clueless."

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Amber Hurdle

"Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out they've got a second."

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Amber Hurdle

"Many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices."

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Amber Hurdle

"I hope that people will finally come to realize that there is only one 'race' - the human race - and that we are all members of it."

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Amber Hurdle

"I'm not sure whay I've been drawn to this subject, except that murder is a subject that has always drawn people for as long as people have been telling stories."

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Tom Lehrer
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!"
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"Apart from that Mrs Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?"
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Tom Lehrer
"Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it."
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Tom Lehrer
"An actress must never lose her ego - without it she has no talent."
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Tom Lehrer
"Bad weather always looks worse through a window."
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Tom Lehrer
"I feel that if a person has problems communicating the very least he can do is to shut up."
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Tom Lehrer
"In my youth there were words you couldn't say in front of a girl; now you can't say 'girl.'"
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Tom Lehrer
"The Army has carried the American ideal to its logical conclusion. Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and color, but also on ability."
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Tom Lehrer
"It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years."
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Tom Lehrer
"When you get to fifty-two food becomes more important than sex."
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