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"The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong."
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"Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column."

"While there is a chance of the world getting through its troubles, I hold that a reasonable man has to behave as though he were sure of it. If at the end your cheerfulness in not justified, at any rate you will have been cheerful."
Explore more quotes by Andy Rooney

"The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men."

"Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt."

"When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper."

"People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe."

"Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose."

"The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians."

"I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran."
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